WARNING

WARNING...These are just some thoughts that came across my mind lately. I needed to vent and try to get my thoughts in order so I'm doing it here in hopes of writing and reading it will give me some clarity. I may or may not act upon the thoughts that are written. Keep in mind, I am venting. Toonces, even though I tried to deny it the last conversation we had, I'm starting to see where you were coming from and I'm starting to think you were right. Me and you are almost one in the same on how we handle things and I'm now I'm slowly starting to sink back into my old ways: Taking care of #1 and starting not to giving two scoops about what everybody else thinks or says. Now some of you might say, "Well that's the way it's supposed to be anyways" but what some of you maybe thinking and what I used to do are two seperate entities. You tried to warn me but you know how I am especially when I think I'm right. Now I keep asking myself, do I really want regress back to that state of mind. Part of me says no. I've come a very long way to get where I'm at and that battle wasn't easy. Reverting back would be like a slap in the face to some and all that work would of been for naught. On the other hand the other part of me says, "Do what you gotta do." I've burned bridges and cut people off before with no regrets and no remorse. If you got dealt a dirty hand, you got dealt a dirty hand. Deal with it, know what I mean. That was the way I was done by people who called themselves my friends in the past so I picked up on it that trait and applied it for myself. Granted, that made a lot of people mad but some got over it and at least I wasn't the one being done dirty anymore. But then I begin to thinking about the phrase"what comes around goes around" and the scripture in Hebrews 10:30 that says"Vengeance belongeth onto me, I will recompense, saith the Lord." I remember a prayer that my friend Amy used to pray for her friends and family. It ended with "and let those who come against my friends and family get it back 7 fold." I don't wish the Lords vengeance on anyone. Trust, it may not happen right away but when it does, it's not a pretty thing. I also think about Matthew 6:14-15: "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." Hmm... now that's something to think about and it gave me the peace of mind I needed.